The Karmic Press – Page 5 – We Came to Drop Knowledge

How We Are Perceived: To Care or Not To Care

We are confused.

Many of us think the only way to find true inner happiness is to be in a state of mind where we can stop caring about what other people think. We want to be in a place where we can follow our own path and chase our excitement moment by moment without hesitation, and without fear of judgment.

Now if this were at all easy, everyone would simply do it IMMEDIATELY. But we procrastinate. “One day I’ll break through,” we tell ourselves. “I’ll speak my mind like someone from Spain speaks Spanish. I’ll be myself like just like they say in that Audioslave song. And I’ll do what I want like Eric Cartman on Maury!” (wha-eva!)

This is the common attitude of teenagers and young adults. We know we’re being held back by something, and we just can’t wait to overcome it. This is because as we went through adolescence, most of us made an unavoidable and painful trade off: In exchange for blissful innocence, we gain self awareness.

Before adolescence, we simply ARE ourselves all the time. Why would we be someone else? Our parents love us for who we are, the world thinks we’re just adorable, and friendship comes naturally without any drama. Money is something we may desire, but it’s just a thing, not a purpose. Love is just this harmless word used in Disney films that makes girls giggle and causes the boys to want to vomit. Death is something that only happens to old people, pets, and soldiers. But not us! We’ll live forever! Right?

Then adolescence knocks on the door. Or more accurately, it just rudely barges in, unannounced, entering at different times for different people. “Why is everyone except me thinking about sex so much?” Or, “am I the only one thinking about sex this much?” If you’re a boy, there’s a pressure to grow out of shyness and become outgoing and independent. If you’re a girl, there’s a pressure to physically grow into a shape that’s pleasant to look at so you can become popular and successful, just like all the “happy,” glamorous women on TV and in movies. There’s a pressure on us to keep up with all the funny videos online, listen to the music everyone is listening to, and have stories about all the fun things we do outside of school so you’re not labeled as boring.

But wait – there’s more! On top of this, we have to learn all the things we’re told is important to learn, which for some reason, has stopped being as fun as it was in elementary school. God forbid you intuit that all these pressures and unspoken expectations seem slightly… messed up? If we start to act out or get depressed because we sense that such an artificial judgmental environment isn’t conducive to our personal path of creative, outside of the box self expression, then lucky us! The chemicals in our brain must be out of balance.

Many don’t need pills. Many breeze through school with little difficulty, make lots of friends and have a healthy dating life. Many have a great experience in college, get a steady job, and rent a nice, roomy apartment. So if life is going great, why does it seem we still care so much about what people think about us? Why can’t we just enjoy ourselves and be like a kid again?

The reason we can’t be kids again is that ignorance is bliss – once we’re done with adolescence, we simply know too much! We’re conscious of the consequences of certain actions, or lack of action. We know what’s considered normal and abnormal behavior, we’re aware of what’s considered a talent or what’s considered a flaw.

The solution is to integrate the awareness that we learned in adolescence with the lack of self judgment we want to recapture from childhood. There are many ways of doing this, and this article isn’t meant to be a step by step how-to guide. The main point is, we can’t put on diapers and try to make time go backwards. We need to move forward and find a way to enjoy ourselves without trying to do away with self awareness.

The emotions that come with self-awareness are not a bad thing. True, we want to be the creators of our own reality and be able to choose optimism in every situation – we want the ability to keep our cool even if everyone on Earth except you spontaneously turned into Bill Cosby.

But our capacity for insecurity isn’t something to beat ourselves up over – it serves a powerful evolutionary function. We innately do want some sort of feedback from the world as far as how effectively we’re contributing to it. If we feel we’re contributing successfully, our brain rewards us. If we feel our existence is pointless, our behavior becomes self destructive.

This need for purpose can only be satisfied by us alone, but our journey based on fulfilling this purpose requires the help of others. This is why it’s slightly delusional to want to detach completely from what people think of us. What happens when we try and fake being completely detached from others’ opinion is we turn into someone like Donald Trump, and no one wants that.

The more we take people’s perceptions into consideration, the wiser we become. We need others to help us with our self evaluation, but without letting it affect our self-worth. Ultimately, we should be able to comfortably tweak how to make our contributions to humankind as our self awareness grows. Once free of the unhealthy type of self-judgment, we’re motivated to give back to the world — not because we’re expected to, but because we want to.

Hypnosis Dressed in A Clever Disguise: Review of The Landmark Forum

Enlightenment or Imprisonment?

The Landmark Forum offers a truly tempting invitation...

Who doesn’t want to “experience a positive and permanent shift in the quality of their life?” Who wouldn’t want the tools necessary to help one create their vision of a truly extraordinary future? The Landmark Forum is a program that is suitable for anyone. Not only for people with massive emotional blocks due to traumatizing circumstances in their life, but for people who are seekers, artists, businessmen, and even family men and women. The forum is designed for everyone because it pertains to humanity in general and understanding the psychology of our emotions and memories. Landmark is a company that claims to be dedicated to the well being of individuals and their role in society but their approaches are something that proves otherwise.
I have heard of the Forum in the past. First, from a friend from college; My friend was a very open minded and driven individual, so it was understandable as to why I had a positive perspective of it. From that point on, I have heard of it “here and there” and was also aware that many companies have worked with Landmark and even send their employees to attend seminars to create a more productive and effective workplace. If big companies with big money would invest in such a thing, I thought that “Surely, it must be legitimate.”

From a selling point of a view, all of it was there. Their vocabulary is particular and very well chosen. Landmark uses keywords like vision, action, power, freedom, peace of mind, and so on. They use all the right words to get their message across of exactly what they hope to assist you with, and after considering that one may not be as happy as they’d perhaps like to be, the idea of saying “no” just begins to lose sense. The moment the phrase enters your head: “Well what do I have to lose,” all bets are off. You are then vulnerable to any thing and any possibility. Any guru, any book, any program. Even the wrong ones.

I finally decided to register for the course when attending a friend’s graduation of the Advanced Seminar Program. She was incredibly happy with the program, approached some of the unhealthy relationships in her life with a new perspective, and she genuinely felt more ready to take on life. After being given such a high recommendation from such a great friend, it became more and more difficult to resist. She kindly gifted me the $200 deposit needed to register for the Forum and I paid the remainder of the balance. It was honestly, a very generous invitation.

The Syllabus for The Landmark Forum is as follows:

Day One
Orientation and Overview: How The Landmark Forum Works
Already Always Listening
The Hidden Power of Context
The Vicious Cycle
Rackets: The Payoff and The Cost

Day Two
The Illusion of Someday: Rethinking Possibility
The Myth of “Is” and “I”
Distinguishing: Opening New Worlds
Freedom From Anxiety
How Identities Get Constructed

Day Three:
The Pervasive Influence Of The Past
Change vs. Transformation
Language as an Access To Power
The Nature of Choice

Tuesday Evening Session
New Possibilities, Breakthrough Results, and a Quick Review
Transformation as a Way of Living
Dealing Powerfully with Breakdowns

Below is a portion of Landmark Forum’s Agreement Form stating that they cannot be held accountable for any emotional or psychological damage. Click the image for full size. The entire form can be found here.

It was the first day of the Forum and I wasn’t sure what to expect. I was proud of myself for committing to something so new and intense and even though it came with a pretty big price tag, I felt that if anything is worth investing in, it would be my personal growth and understanding of self.

During the first day it seemed as though the first half of the day was spent being told just how WONDERFUL the Forum is. I sat there, at times dozing off, learning just how successful Landmark is, about their different clients, the potential results, the incredible transformations and “Breakthroughs,” all the while wondering when the actual seminar was going to begin. When they finally began, I found myself to be incredibly irritated. It turned out that I paid for a curriculum of information that I had already quite deeply explored. It was rather clear that Landmark was teaching spiritual eastern philosophical concepts without the spiritual element, with about a tablespoon of really good psychology, and a dash of common sense. I wondered how long it took them to reword famous concepts and package them as nicely as they did. Furthermore, I sat there in their uncomfortable chair wondering how many Osho books I could have bought for all the money I had spent – An undeniably depressing thought.
Towards the end of the evening, I had decided Landmark was most certainly not for me. I approached the supervisor that was seated in the back of the room to inquire about a refund. She told me that the time to request a refund had passed and that the opportunity for one was already offered this morning. I told her I was really unhappy with the program and that this material was nothing new to me. Instead of just telling me yes or no, she tried to psychoanalyze me. She looks me in the eyes and asks: “Tell me, what is it that you want out of life?” I fed her ego a little bit, but quickly went back to my initial question. Not getting the answer that I wanted, I walked back to my seat infuriated, hoping that through magic, this experience would really turn around and quickly.

By the end of the night I was mentally and emotionally exhausted. I went home, not to sleep, but to instead try to get back to MYSELF. My mood was frayed and unpleasant. I didn’t like how I felt. The homework that they had given, I paid no attention to. When I finally went to bed, I had stupidly not left much time for enough rest.

Upon waking for the second day of the Forum, I was already dreading walking back into that large windowless basement room that felt as cold as a butcher’s refrigerator. About 1-2 hours of the morning was spent being told just how beneficial it would be for our children to be signed up for the teenage and adolescent courses. I had quickly realized that a majority of what I had paid for was to listen to how wonderful the forum is, and yet not much time at all was spent actually learning course material. My anger and irritation had grown exponentially throughout the day. I was relieved when attendees went up to the microphone to share personal stories. It brought humanity to the program and to work with emotions, rather than concepts, was refreshing. However, anyone at the microphone was on a hot spot and one had to prepare themselves that they may hear responses that they may not be psychologically ready for. When people went up to the microphone the leaders strived to help them realize how their past has been not only influencing their future, but actually inhibiting it. With the amount of tears and even at times, confusion, it became very clear why everyone attending was asked to sign a release form prior to the seminar, agreeing that they would not hold Landmark accountable for any emotional or psychological damage. An unusual thing to ask for from someone who is just attending a “self-help seminar,” is it not so?

I could acknowledge that Landmark had some valid things to say. They discuss the reality that everyone perceives life differently. They explain that our past shapes our future not because it does so by nature, but because our memories affect our emotions and at times, our inability to let go of the past does not allow us to fully grasp our potential. And when one doesn’t fully grasp their potential, they pursue a mediocre life, rather than an extraordinary one. They explain that “everyone has their story that they tell themselves” and that we all have “rackets,” which they define as ways of rationalization, in order to express how we consider ourselves “right,” and others “wrong” in doing so. They call this the “Vicious Cycle.”

By the end of the second day, Landmarkians (volunteers who were helping to assist in the seminar) began to hand out flyers with the price breakdown for the Advanced Course. With no surprise, I humorously began lightly laughing to myself and mumbled, “Well, of course.” We were barely done with the second day and already, we’re being told just how effective, impressive, and “useful” the Advanced Seminar would be to anyone who is “serious” about expanding as an individual. My irritation that had temporary disappeared, swiftly returned. When the flyers were being passed down my row, I didn’t bother to take one and passed them along to the next person. To give further incentive, the leaders were sure to notify everyone that they currently have what is noted on the flyer as a “One-Time Only Special Offer,” in which they are selling the Advanced Course for $595, as opposed to $695. At this point not only were flyers being handed out, but there was already a table set with application forms and a lonely Landmarkian eagerly waiting to help assist whoever dared approach him.

I don’t deny that for an ordinary person with no spiritual background or knowledge of consciousness, how a program LIKE (keyword) this could benefit. HOWEVER, I am also very aware of how easily a person can be damaged by such a program, especially those who are not exactly self-aware, meaning that they don’t observe or readily work through their emotions. Meaning, those who more often distract themselves from what bothers them. The concepts that are offered in this seminar are honestly heavy ones to accept. They are also presented with quite a lot of SHOCK value. They are concepts that can take people years to accept, understand, and learn to work with. They are concepts that can psychologically destroy a person because it demands a lot of how one views their reality.

Landmark prides itself by claiming to be “the leaders in breakthrough technology,” but what they actually do is break people down in order to then build them in THEIR image.

They insist that “this is a safe environment for you to be with your emotions” all the while trying to sell you to sign up for the next course. While it can be helpful to bring about a certain level of awareness, one begins to feel as through Landmark is what they need to maintain a constant level of growth.

So what happens through all of this is that Landmark becomes some sort of God to worship. And even more upsetting, it becomes what people give credit to for their epiphanies and understanding of self, meanwhile, each individual holds the potential to be their own Guru. (Everyone should seriously watch Kumare) But that is not what Landmark would teach you, for every individual would immediately come to realize that such a course is of no necessity to better understand oneself. Landmark creates empowerment within boundaries, so instead of teaching people to learn from ALL experiences, and instead of encouraging individuals to simply dedicate more time to contemplating their reality, they insist that “this environment” is what will bring about the next following breakthrough.

Landmark benefits from what any company benefits from. They benefit from damaged individuals, and isn’t the majority of society damaged? The same way one is made to think a certain piece of clothing will help shape their image or make them look better, one is taught that Landmark is what will help one live a more fulfilled life. That Landmark is what will help them shake them of their disturbing past that they cannot seem to escape from.

By the end of the second day I was ready to quit entirely. I had called my friend who invited me to take the Forum to honestly explain my disappointment. She brought up the idea that maybe my expectations were too high and that, that was not allowing me to really let the material soak in. I hung up the phone feeling more inspired and hopeful that the next day at Landmark would be much better.

On Sunday, the third day, things felt different. More people went up to the microphone to share their life experiences and I could even relate to some of them. The leaders dove more deeply into the curriculum, reading from their secret manual that rested on a tripod stand in front of them. This was the day where they would “drop the bomb,” the day where they explained that those who haven’t in their terms “popped” yet or understood the material, that Today would be The Day.

On this day they would also allow us to experience the meditative exercise that they have designed for the course. In the exercise we were told to close our eyes and just take deep breaths, as one would prepare for any guided meditation. But this wasn’t your ordinary meditation, meant to instill peace. The whole intention of this exercise was to instill fear, and to allow attendees to deeply, and with no hesitation, feel their fear. We were told to be aware of the fact that we may become emotional, and that at times, certain feelings, or memories may come up that we find painful. The leaders guided the exercise with different phrases and brought up different scenarios. One of the scenarios was “Imagine that there are 3.7 million people in New York City and imagine that you are afraid of all of them..” The exercise became even more disturbing as people in the room began to crack, breakdown, and cry. Some woman had even acted out her internal chaos, where her sobbing was followed with screams of “No! No! No!,” as she probably recalled a traumatizing experience.

I sat there in total disbelief, trying my absolute best not to let it affect me. Despite their instruction to go deeper into our fear, I felt the need to disobey. I had spent years becoming familiar with my fear, in my own life, and I have recently begun working to harness the light and love within me, to harvest and nourish that energy instead. Despite what the leaders instructed, my whole intention throughout the exercise was to be the calm within the storm, to stay strong, present, and meditative despite all the cries, sighs, sobbing, and sniffles surrounding me. To sit there in my light became more and more difficult, not to mention, I found myself very overwhelmed with the experience people were having around me. Luckily, the other half of the exercise finally came into existence where they instructed people to then PIVOT their experience and now to feel the strength within them. I was glad that the meditative chaos of cries was over.

When the leaders had finally dropped the bomb, the lesson they had for us was that we create the MEANING of life, that life itself has no meaning, and that Life Is Our To Create. It was a profound and true statement, but not one that is uncommon and one that anyone can find in the Spiritual Section of their local book store.

For the evening portion of the third day, the people who had introduced us to Landmark were invited to celebrate with us as we neared the completion of the seminar. Upon returning from our dinner break, the room was rearranged with two times as many chairs and with tables in the back flooded with signup sheets for the Advance Course. The leaders speak about what it would be like to live in a world where everyone had this particular knowledge of self-awareness and that “now that you have the knowledge, if you want to learn the tools to really apply this knowledge, then the Advance Course will allow you to do so. ” The leaders ask those who invited us to raise their hands if they are already registered of if they have already completed the Advance Course to better encourage us. Many hands rose in the air, supposed proof of how effective their program is. Once the evening had finally commenced attendees and past graduates mingled in the room. Leaders and Landmarkians also wandered throughout the room to interact with attendees to ask if we will be registering for the Advance Course. The supervisor that was present for the course (the one who earlier has refused me the refund) even asked me if I wanted to sign up for the Assistance Program, where Landmark graduates volunteer to help at other seminars. I wanted to laugh in her face but I politely refrained.

Throughout my entire Landmark Experience my emotions boiled with horrid and dire confusion. I really wanted to give the program an honest attempt, and I really hoped to gain something from it, but hearing material that I was already very familiar with was disappointing to say the least. Having my ass glued to an uncomfortable chair for 13 hours per day for three consecutive days was exhausting, so was their jargon and their vocabulary that proved a desperate attempt to create new definitions for simple words. In the beginning the leaders talked about us “popping” or getting it, and for those who didn’t get it, they used humor, saying that if we didn’t get it now, that by “Sunday at 4:52pm” (the third day) we would. The leaders were charismatic, as of course they had to be, and there was something incredibly “inauthentic” about them, as if their smiles weren’t as honest as I’d like them to be. The room contained people that are probably very decent human beings, but also people that are clearly desperate to get further in life, or at least further in their understanding of self. Landmark’s tactics manipulate people that seek honest things like comfort, answers, and guidance. They break people down in order to build them in their image. They also train people, multiple times throughout the day, with the use of particular vocabulary and by pointing to certain examples, just how important it is to share this program with friends and family. They blatantly point out that they do not advertise and that their business operates on word-of-mouth referrals, and by pointing it out so honestly it makes one assume that their approach surely must be honest, even genuine, meanwhile, attendees do not realize that by the time the third day is over that they have seriously become hypnotized. By the third day people are pressured or “encouraged in a friendly way” to sign up for the Advance Course and for Tuesday’s evening session, attendees are urged to invite friends and family “whom you think would benefit” and with whom you’d like to share your new life with. Tuesday is nothing more than a marketing ploy, yet it described as “the final portion of the seminar.”

While many people say that Landmark is not a cult because it does not isolate people from others, what it does DO is that it isolates people emotionally by imprisoning them into a certain mindset and vocabulary. People are given a new type of awareness to work with and Landmark is quick to express that “most people” DO NOT work on this level of thinking. People may be inspired by the end of the program to reevaluate certain aspects of their life, however, people are also aware of the fact that not everyone will understand their new approach to life. People are urged to invite others not to “help” these other people, but to honestly save themselves from feeling alone, or misunderstood by the majority of their clique or social group.

Jean-Pierre Brard, deputy mayor of Montreuil, and who use to be vice president of the investigating committee on cults in the French Assembly, stated the following about Landmark:

“Clearly, there’s a guru who destabilizes people to enslave them, to make them subservient, which been said by witnesses. You can also see that they make you relinquish critical thought, and break the person down so they can then pick up the pieces. You can also see that there’s a network of money. The ultimate goal is to press it’s power and clean out the student’s wallets, and by using the students to attempt to earn more. So, there are the criteria of domination, a network of money, subordination and brainwashing. So, it’s a cult. You still have a group, you have a pyramid structure, you still have a jargon that separates you from your family and society, and you still have the element of money from people who are victims.”

Landmark’s vocabulary and perspective can also create close-minded individuals. In their explanation of how “everyone has their story” and their ways of rationalizing, individuals can be not as open to hearing people out, due to being occupied with labeling and over-analyzing people’s behavior. The problem is that one spends time too much time distinguishing what an individual’s emotions depict about their character, rather than listening to what the person has to say. Again, proof of isolation through certain perceived mindset. This was clearly seen with the Forum leaders. They were mocking some of the participants, and furthermore, they showed just how humored they were by those who didn’t entirely get the program or who haven’t yet “popped.”

Landmark lures people in with the promise of a better understanding of self, when in truth all that is needed for a better understanding of self is just TIME WITH ONE SELF. My biggest problem with this program is that yet again, people are urged to go to others looking for answers (attending Landmark seminar/classes), meanwhile, in truth, one must learn to spend time with themselves if they wish to seek answers, not with those who will promise you something at the cost of a price.

Money cannot buy enlightenment. Only the illusion of it. It is better to buy a book with which to reflect on your own reality, rather than have an outsider tell you what reality is or isn’t.

I desperately urge you to look within your own temple of self.

“What influences public opinion is only the storefront. The cults you cited have a religious pretense and hide behind that screen. Here, there’s no religious element. But there’s still a doctrine. The basis of Landmarks’ doctrine essentially rests on a philosophical concept. It’s the concept of authenticity. “We’re going to teach people to be authentic.” Jean-Pierre Jougla, a French attorney and “anti-cult” advocate

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Somewhere in the Middle

Why think in Black and White rather than shades of gray?

On both sides of a conflict one side seems to continually blame the other. In this state of constant flux and push pull antics no compromise can be achieved, and it seems the argument becomes polarized. Just like two negatively charged magnetic poles, each side is doomed to continually repel the other.

People seem to believe they are right most of the time, and when you have your mind made up about something 100% there is no room for compromise. The ability to think outside the box, or even think objectively becomes seriously impaired. If we cannot be objective then we fail to see from another or multiple points of view, and it becomes difficult to understand where our opponent’s viewpoints originate. Without understanding, there is only misunderstanding, and the disagreement continues without resolution.

So how can a conflict be resolved if we fail to understand our opponent’s point of view, or know what it’s like to stand in their shoes? The answer is that it simply cannot be solved until open mindedness and willingness for mutual agreement, and or co-operation is achieved.

When we compromise with someone else we give and take. That is, we are willing to make sacrifices and hope that so too is the opposite party, that we may reach a middle ground.

So how do we reach a place where negotiation can start to occur in a constructive manner?

We have to become reasonable, that is we have to provide evidence that supports our statements of opinion and belief system. This evidence needs to be subject to peer review. Without peer review the evidence presented in favor of our arguments becomes inadmissible to the negotiation and is therefore not a reasonable argument.

If we can make a reasonable argument then we also have to be open to a reasonable argument that casts doubt on our belief system. If you keep an open mind it’s easier to be reasoned with. Especially if you accept that it’s okay to be wrong, when good evidence is presented that is contrary to your present belief being argued.

Nothing is cut and dry, or black and white, but only shades of gray. If this were not true then we would not formulate our opinions on things. The truth lies somewhere in the middle, or is combined of elements presented in both arguments.

If we can train ourselves to have a more open mind, learn to see outside the box, and are ok with being wrong, greater understanding and peace can be achieved when both sides of an argument try to discuss and debate their differences.

So never make your mind up 100% about anything, and therefore you will not only remain objective, but be gifted with the achievement of having an open mind.

If we are open minded our lives are much easier to navigate, and we will come into less conflict with others, especially those with closed minds because of the understanding we managed to acquire and sustain.

Raw Beauty

Remaining secure in an insecure world can be quite a challenge. For centuries women have been made to feel like ugly ducklings if their bodies were a different shape, color or texture from the societal norm and trend. Growing up in a world bombarded by subliminal messages prepares us for a lifetime of battle, rather than loving and seeing how sacred and beautiful we truly are. Beauty is not a physical feature; it is a commitment to our own health and well-being. Beauty is a belief, a knowingness. Beauty comes in ALL shapes and sizes.

There are evolutionary reasons why bodies are exactly the way they are. Looking back at our ancestral lineage we can trace our body’s genetic descendants. Our genes have adapted over the centuries to various climates and environments; extremely dry heat to bone chilling cold. Bodies have adjusted to the flow of the water and the grounding nature of the mountains; tall and thin verses short and sturdy. There are an unlimited scope of shapes and sizes. Our bodies are an identical blueprint of Mother Earth. We share the exact same land to water ratio as well as our blood and her blood (the sea) have the same pH balance. How many variations of landscape span across the globe?!

How much surplus energy would we have for creative expression if we spent less time worrying about our physical appearance? The constant obsession over this curve and that diet zaps our energy, dims our creative fire, and is actually more ‘fattening’ than the foods we indulge in. All this time trying to be something we are not creates a mask of shame and insecurity that keeps us hidden and unsure of the brilliant diamond that we really are. Our body is our birthright and the vessel that we are gifted with to carry us through this life.

We are not going to meet who we want, rather we will continue to attract who we are, now. It is our internal outlook on life that our external world views, like a movie, acted out by subtle energies that most are unaware of. If you embody beauty, grace and sensuality, others will pick up on this and mirror it back to you.

Of course the opposite is also true.

Spending countless time and energy attempting to change who we are is equivalent to walking up to a wall and saying, “Hey you, stupid wall, you should be a tree, then you could offer me some shade. What good are you, wall?” Rather than loving the wall for its strengths of stability and foundation, we may spend our one, precious life agonizing over something we are not. Looking for greener grass is not a solution. We must water and nourish the grass that waits beneath our own two feet.

If we are not free and content in our body temple, then how are we to be free within the world? It is not the world that has to change for us to be comfortable, but rather it is we that need a shift in perspective. There are always going to be the insecure, the followers, and conformers. It is now up to us to embrace and embody our wholeness: To remember who we are and to step into our true power. If we are distracted by physical appearance and material gain all the time we are no help to our Self or to this world. This is the moment to wipe the dust from our eyes in order to see clear. We are a perfectly divine reflection of all creation. There is no more needing to be, to see or to find.

We have arrived. Welcome home.

See Beauty in All or see beauty in none.

Freddie Stevenson serenades us!

I first stumbled upon Freddie on a lovely Spring day in Central Park a few years ago. At the time, he was playing with the Dirty Urchins and they were an all-male band back then. No doubt, everyone had their talent and the people that stayed around to watch were proof of this, but it was clear to me who was the gem the moment I heard Freddie’s lyrics and his beautiful guitar. I finally managed to track him down to ask him about life, his inspiration, and his solo music.

Freddie Stevenson – Here Today, Gone Tomorrow

Interview with NYC Busker Freddie Stevenson

The Dangerous Pursuit of Validation

Virtually, all of us are prisoners and chances are, you probably don’t realize it. The truth is we all fall victim to chasing this intangible thing you might have heard of: APPROVAL. We exhaustively try to prove our point of view and that we are worthy of another’s friendship, love, respect or acceptance. With every endeavor for this, we lose a bit of ourselves to impress others.

Nothing good can possibly come from painstakingly selling ourselves. We cringe when pursuits of recognition are in vain, and we prepare for battle ready to discredit another’s intelligence or spew personal attacks of character. The truth is our biggest battle is within, as we hope for others to convince us of the very things we don’t believe about ourselves.

We can’t seem to quiet that voice in our head that tells us to keep picking at an issue until we receive satisfaction in the form of two words: “I agree” or “You’re right.” Perhaps we’d settle for an “I understand.”

When we don’t receive that our thirst for validation begins triumphing over the feelings of others. Even when in the wrong, sometimes we desperately latch on to the other person’s slip ups, which can be refuted and excuse our own. We aim to maintain our last bit of power and seek a self-given pat on the back, because others are not endowing it to us.

At times we refuse to give apologies when they’re due, which feeds the ego-driven beast residing within many of us. Unfortunately, a lot of us fall victim to this notion that our views, actions, words, ways, and lifestyle are the correct ones. Furthermore, the words we tend to find are the most profound ones that supplement our views, because agreement, like one’s approval, is music to our ears.

Each of us possesses different life experiences, cultures, religions, political ideologies, and so on. So really, why do we care so much that another person’s opinions, ethics, morals or beliefs don’t align with our own?

No matter how great your conviction is, be prepared for the possibility that those you care to impress just might stick to their original judgments. Of course it’s a defense mechanism, but we must recognize that it’s also natural, because no matter how hard we try to relate or sympathize with another, each person can only see things through their own eyes. After all, everything is subjective.

Refrain from convincing others to validate you or understand everything about you. Free yourself from this burden, and accept yourself so you won’t need others to. Invite yourself to fall in love with your being, and do what makes your soul content.

Renaissance of Love

Love has been changing and transforming since before humans have existed. The ancient scripts write of love; the mystics, poets and all religions, even you and I tell stories of love. Love is an action, a state of being and in its purest essence a continuous returning home to our natural state. This expanded love is free from narrow minded thoughts, habitual emotions, and conditional ways. We can begin now, exactly where we are, invoking and co-creating this renaissance of love.

Self love

Self love is the foundation of all other loves. In order to truly love another, you must first learn to love yourself. This is the true love affair; from which all other loves grow and reflect. We start with ourselves, by being gentle, patient and by radically accepting our glory and our flaws. The more we can love our shadows, insecurities and wounds, the more we can hold space to love others through their imperfections. Embrace and discover who you are and what gifts you have offer to the world.

Returning to love

The journey to love expanded is simply returning home. Home is not a particular place, space, or face. Home is complete acceptance for what is and the courage to rise for what needs to be. I believe that this pure love, this coming home, is our natural state. Fear and worry are traits we pick up along the way, that we have to learn how to let go of. There is no one prescription for returning to love that is universal. Some common themes are: spending time in nature, swimming in the sea, walking bare foot, alone/solitude time, a hot bath, making music, writing, creating art, dancing under the stars, howling at the moon… you have to experiment to find things that really speak to you, those that open your heart and bring you back to the joy and celebration that is your birthright.

However, there is a trap, a big misconception that once you have arrived you are here and here to stay. Even though we have arrived at love’s door, chances are at some point we may still get turned around in the chambers of fear. We are human after all, we fall and we get back up. This is a process of returning, again and again. Imagine you bring water up from the well to quench your deep thirst, you feel satiated as the fresh water trickles down your chin. The bucket may last you a day, a few days, but you will get thirsty again, and will have to return to the well to continuously draw up water. In this way, we proceed to take action. Over and over again we must return to that well to quench our thirst.

Love expanded vs Practical love

Practical love is most commonly a love that comes with it’s own rules and conditions. It says, “I only love you if you do this, look like this or behave like that.” How common is it to feel overflowing love for someone when they do something super sweet for us, and the opposite to feel grumpy or annoyed towards someone when they don’t meet our request?! A massive leap on the road to love expanded is leaving behind all expectations. As far as the behavior of our loved ones, we can simply make requests, and respect and appreciate whether those specific requests were met or not. For example, a communication dialogue I find very effective: “when you don’t clean up your dishes, i feel annoyed, upset, and that i’m constantly picking up after you. My request is that you please help to clean the dishes after we are finished eating.” In this way, love expanded is also extremely practical, the main difference being is that it is unconditional. Desire is the vehicle of transformation, it is our attachment to the outcome of these desires which is the root of suffering.

How do we consciously and unconsciously restrict love? By allowing our old thought patterns, our concepts and ideals of separation to direct our actions and emotions. The more we place shame, criticisms, and judgement on ourself or others, we are paddling further away from the island of love. In oder to tap into this expanded love, we need to let go of our own stories, putting down the script of how we think things should be and allowing them to just be. The return to love is a return to simplicity, a listening, a softening and an awakening. When old thoughts bubble to the service, it is best to look at them, see them as they are and allow them to purely be. In this sense, less is more. if we judge our judgements all we do is create internal war and further separation. If we allow, embrace, and feel we can begin melting away old tensions, healing ancient wounds and creating new feedback loops in our ways of being in and viewing the world.

Begin now

Start where you are, now, and live from an authentic and honest space. We don’t go far by pretending to be someone we are not. Just like everything in life, getting better at a skill requires discipline and continuous practice. In order to build a new muscle, we must begin with simple exercises and disciples. Acknowledge our faults and realize we are in the midst of an amazing learning process. Learning a new language is extremely humbling, and we must remember that it requires patience. We have a tremendous capacity to change and transform ourselves. However, old patterns are trenched deep in our subconscious, and creates blind-spots around love. Allowing ourselves to be vulnerable and ask for help when needed is critical on this journey. Begin again, over and over until this new paradigm of love becomes your natural way.

10 steps to start on your path of Love Expanded:

1. Everyday write 10 things you are grateful for. The attitude of gratitude is extremelypowerful and will begin training your mind towards positive and affirming thoughts.

2. Remember, it’s never personal.. even if it feels so personal

3. Listen carefully. The mind screams and the heart whispers.

4. Take time daily to return, whether this is through writing, reading, dancing, walking, meditation.. do something for you and only you.

5. When mistakes are made, remember we are only human. treat yourself and others as if they were a child; embrace them, tell them it’s ok, and move forward.

6. Drop all expectations, of yourself and others.

7. At the end of the day ask yourself these questions. “What did i do today to love myself?” “What did i do today to love others?” “How can i love more fully tomorrow?”

8. When you catch yourself in a negative or old thought pattern, stop, take a deep breath, and create a new thought. Repeat this new thought over and over, like a mantra. Eventually these positive thoughts will become impulse instead of feeling forced.

9. Spend sometime bathing in the unconditioned love of babies, animals and nature – these are some of our greatest teachers.

10. Look into the mirror, deep into your eyes, and practice sending out love and light through the eyes only, without speech. Train yourself to soften into love.

Dare to Live a Fabulous Existence

Here you are,

a person in this world trying to make sense of it all.

You find yourself alone in your home one evening and you sit there contemplating why you can’t seem to be like the people you know, or have heard about, or why luck hasn’t discovered you the way it magically appears to have when it comes to people that are spread all over the silver screen. You know you’re not entirely content and you hope you’re entirely pathetic either. You know “there’s more to all of it,” and if there is some type of equation to “having it all,” or at least “getting it,” you definitely have yet to stumble upon it. So what the hell is going on anyway? You’ve had it with the confusion, the countless nights of wondering yourself into a black hole, and the more you take the time to analyze, the more lost and disconnected you feel. You know you “have it in you” and yet you begin to wonder if you were born with some type of defect because the box you came in seems to have come without a key to this potential that you feel everyone must have. (For if everyone doesn’t have it, we’re all fucking doomed.) These nights don’t end well, as the emotions tend to very easily pour into the next morning. Life lacks luster and you don’t exactly feel excited about rising to a new day; It all begins to blend together after a while. If your life were a photograph, it would lack the color necessary to mesmerize, and during a time you can’t even recall, it seems as though someone de-saturated your entire existence with the click of a button in Photoshop.

So what is going on? Is there even a remedy? Perhaps some alchemical elixir to cure your needs, as well as your exponential insanity. Are you doomed to trusting your life in the hands of others? Doctors, pharmacists, reality tv stars? Who will inspire you? Who the hell will save you? Who will tell you your final diagnosis? Is there any hope, any hope at all?

You’re hoping that you “get it” and that you “get it” really soon. The more discontent you are, the more anxious you begin to feel. And the more you acknowledge your anxiety, you recognize that it does not belong. And in search of trying to shoo it away, it just comes back, and this time, in tidal waves. The last thought always seems to be: Do you even have the ability to carry out what everyone calls a “normal life?” Is there even such a thing?

The billboards, the tv shows, the news reporters, the school systems, the politicians, your parents, your peers, and even your so called doctors, have you all fooled. The way society runs is easy to understand when one understands the mind-programming we’ve been raised with. And to call it anything else is to simply deny the reality we are all faced with. Why else such resistance? Why else such fear? Why else would an “outsider” stand out for being different? Why else would radical ideas be, at least first, criticized so harshly? Because being different is not what is advertised. Being fashionable is. Looking good is. Having status, money, and influence is, but they’re sure to inform you that “not everyone” could achieve such a level in the social ladder. And the way they sell you this mentality, and the same way every generation is raised with it (in front of their TV, through the radio, in newspapers and magazines, and by everyone that follows suit,) wouldn’t be as successful as it is if their approach, their skill, their knowledge of psychology, and their presentation weren’t as damn good as it is.

Let’s face it: They know what they’re doing, they’ve studied this and expanded upon it, and they’ve got “the majority” by the balls. To put it bluntly: You’ve been fooled to think that you can’t think for yourself, and you’ve been convinced to be concerned about the opinions of everyone else. Everyone else except your own. You’ve been taught that there’s a certain way to live life, meanwhile, it’s rather clear that there isn’t. They won’t tell you that you’re fabulous, that you’re brilliant, or that MASS POTENTIAL lays embedded within each of us. Because all of that makes it more difficult to sell their products and their services. All of that makes it more difficult to keep you tuning in to their tv stations and fear-based news casts. All of that is much easier to sell to broken people that are desensitized, and essentially, dead inside. All possible because they’ve been raised with the idea that they are not good enough, and that hey, let’s face it, perhaps it “in your genetics,” and “you can’t” do a god damn thing about it. Steven Furtick, the pastor of Elevation Church in Charlotte, North Carolina, has said: “The reason we struggle with insecurity is because we compare our behind-the-scenes with everyone’s highlight reel.”

So what happens when one begins to truly contemplate? When one sits there in solitude, with no external distractions, meditating upon their very existence?

Well, the life within you suddenly begins to emerge, like a flower that breaks through the crack in a slab of concrete. The life of many emotions, perspectives, experiences, memories, desires, and regrets. Life begins to rise to the surface. And for how long of a while will you let your life rise to the surface through the thoughts that find you? How long are you willing to sit there and face each one of them? Us human folk are quick to distract and easy to entice. But what if we decided to instead turn inward, and sit with ourselves for a while?

When one acquires the courage to face the life that begins to emerge, it’s easy to at first feel startled or overwhelmed. Life seemed dull and colorless, now it’s shouting at you and the pace of life is RACING. You’re faced with the honest reality that you are not happy, that there’s something that needs “figuring out.” Up until now you’ve been willing to listen to the advice of others, and even if some of it was sound and perhaps insanely useful or beneficial, it’s no longer enough. You want to be certain that YOU will be happy with YOURSELF. YOU want to be certain that YOU won’t need to second guess. That YOU can be content in the way that YOU govern your life.

And wouldn’t we all want that? And if we all want that, and know we can have it, then why don’t we? Because our minds have been programmed to think otherwise. Do you recall the saying, If you say it enough, you begin to believe it?

The initial scenario explained above, at the beginning of this article, is typical. There are times we all get lost in thought, but the reason why this happens is because even though we are willing to sit there in our contemplative state, we are still allowing outside perspectives to run our life and not only run it, but control it. And not only control it, but to prohibit it.

So the method now, of willing to be internal explorers in the desert of our minds, becomes a mission. Because it’s not enough to just let yourself experience your thoughts truly and freely. The task now becomes sifting through your thoughts and working with them in a way in which you begin an inner dialogue. You must identify the thoughts that do not serve you, the thoughts that you have been conditioned to think and worse, BELIEVE. And how do you distinguish those that serve you and those that do not? It’s simple: It’s all about being mindful of the emotions they emit. Remember, our emotions are INDICATORS. Does a particular thought make you feel guilty, ashamed, and inferior? If so, please kindly move this into your mental trash can. Does a particular thought provoke you to feel elevated, inspired, and happy? Then please make a mental note that you greatly enjoy feeling and thinking this way. By making such DISTINCTIONS you begin to train your mind. And yes it will take time and absolutely, you must remain dedicated and most of all, COMMITTED to yourself. And you must do this if you ever hope to save yourself. You must be the master but you must also be willing to be the student, and to fulfill both roles confidently and contently, never preferring one over the other, but learning when each applies.

The media, your schools, your governments, and your peers may not teach you this, but I will. You can do and be anything. Why and how could I possibly know that? I know it because I’ve begun to live it. All one has to do is take a look at the world we have created. Could a place like this exist if we were ignorant, incompetent, or in some way challenged? Our abilities are profound. However, the constant effort to silence this knowledge should be acknowledged and most importantly, understood.

Stand up for your right not as an American, or a Christian, or a man, or a woman, or as a blonde or a brunette. These ways of identification (social, ethnic, national, gender, physical) are petty at most and are insanely insignificant when one acknowledges the actual potential we all have. It is not just dreamy to say that we are children of the cosmic universe, it is fact. Look at the world we live in and be in AWE. Learn to be in awe AT ALL TIMES. During every moment of your life. Our existence is baffling. It is not meant to make sense, for the fun of it all may too quickly disappear. But do not be blind to your potential for if you are a witness to it and continue to deny it, then the only person to blame for your mediocre existence is yourself. Dare to challenge the status quo and dare to love yourself enough to keep your mind open, your heart warm, and your soul faithful. Faithful in knowing that POSSIBILITY exists. And most of all, dare to live a fabulous existence.

Dynasty Electric Releases “Euphoria”

Euphoria available on Itunes!

I had the pleasure of interviewing Jenny and Seth of Dynasty Electric just last year and they only continue to roll in with more kickass material!

Dynasty Electric’s new album Euphoria is a brilliant collection of music created through global collaboration. With a luminous sound that lifts you to outer space, their masterpieces are electroshock therapy for the soul. While their rhythm has the proclivity to make one’s body dive into movement, there are beautiful underlying themes behind their captivating sound.

Euphoria is defined as “a feeling or state of intense excitement and happiness,” and this album is meant to remind us that both our lives, and our existence, are meant to be a thrilling, intense, euphoric experience!

Dynasty forces us to consider that living by cultural standards is not always compliant with our vocation. As the lyrics suggest in “RockitShip,” perhaps one ought to “escape the rat race” in order to observe the world from a larger perspective. Dynasty Electric wants to remind us that it’s perfectly ALL RIGHT to be yourself and that it’s worth taking the time in order to get to know Yourself. When we hear in “Electify Your Mind,” “There’s nothing I can give you when the world is yours to find” they are suggesting that we reclaim our roles as nomads in this world and that the magic that we find in life is the magic we’ve chosen, and were willing, to discover.

And since no personal revolution is complete without the willingness to share one’s existential findings with others, Jenny and Seth are sure to remind us of the words of Margaret Fuller in which she said, “If you have knowledge, let others light their candles in it.” This album and the songs within it are all gentle reminders of our own consciousness. When Jenny asks in “Floating Around The Sun”, “Don’t you think it’s time we leave the light on, we’ve been running in the dark for so long,” she is implying, just as Margaret Fuller did, that by enlightening ourselves, we can aid in the enlightenment of those around us.

Dynasty’s overall message of the celebration of freedom is even reflected by the process through which this album was conceived. By being generous and trusting with their music in the collaboration process with different producers from all over the world, they encourage us to do the same: To stay open and receptive to a world of cosmic proportion.